When Engaging Your Kink Goes Right

Engaging your kink and having it go right is the best! I engaged my kinks, being a submissive/pain warrior and a professional Dominatrix. Its been great! Why? Because the release of those sexual/erotic hang ups, were the things I needed to have a higher quality life and a higher quality perspective on who I am.

Allow me to explain: When I decided to check out being a Dominatrix or Professional Female Dom. It was something that I only thought about a few times and never really delved into the feelings and thoughts I had about it. Some of those being: (1) it seems weird to hurt/denigrate a man (usually males were my customers) and (2) I wonder how they feel about their desires. Since I didn't have anyone or know anyone I felt comfortable talking to about this, I kept it to myself and pondered those questions periodically.

Later on, I received an opportunity to practice Bondage and Discipline, and I have I say I initially felt great hesitation because I really hadn't yet dealt with the above thoughts, but when I received such a generous invitation I said, “Sure, why not?” And that took me places.

First off, I should mention, I don't even like to kill bugs, preferring to scoop them up and send them on their way out of my house or vicinity, so whipping someone probably seems a rather opposite behavior to engage in. And yet I did and it has been great, albeit, with some emotional revelations and discoveries I didn't see coming that did produce its own fair amount of turmoil. In this story, I like to think of turmoil as fertilizer for exponential personal growth.

When I subbed for my Dominant, it took me no time to really enjoy being this endurable lady, who found release and an almost indescribable pleasure at pleasing him. This was my entry into BDSM, or simply bondage and discipline and I experienced great pleasure at it. But being a woman who feels, thinks, and is progressive, I also struggled, with the power dynamic, because you know patriarchy.

And when my tour of submissiveness to one Dominant ended, as life does sometimes, I stumbled upon an opportunity to dominate, not long after. After practicing in the art of both, I came to the good part: I learned that I liked having control as much as I liked being out of control and letting someone else control me. In industry and lifestyle parlance, I am a switch, equally wanting to dominate and submit.

And what great fun this has been for me and for countless others, discovering being able to take the reins and demand what you want and being able to hand the reins to someone else and let them demand for a while, has been freeing. Engaging my kink, has led to better vocalizations of my desires and wants and being able to listen and cater to those the desires and wants of those around me. Simply put, engaging your kink, can lead to an improvement in the quality of your life. It's scary, I won't kid you, but the rewards are truly amazing on the other side.